The first time I had sex, I knew it was suppose to hurt. At least, that is what I was always told… so It wasn’t much of a surprise to me when I was in tears because of all the pain the 1st time my husband and I had intercourse.  Over time I expected it to get easier, I expected it to become fun, and romantic, and all of the things I had always read about.

But it didn’t.

This went on for over a year. Trying and failing. Trying and needing to stop because it hurt. Making up excuses so I didn’t have to try and bear it.  Trying to convince my husband that this wasn’t something that was in my head. convincing him that I did love him and that I WANTED him was the biggest struggle, because over that year he was convinced that I just wasn’t attracted to him.

Finally wanting answers, I turned to the internet for an explanation.  I found one. Vaginismus.  I had never heard of it before, but the more I read, the more I was convinced that this is what I had!  I made and appointment with my GYN and he officially diagnosed me with having vaginismus in 2010.

It was a relief for both my husband and I to have a name to go along with my problem. To realize that I wasn’t alone, and to finally understand that there was treatment available.

That treatment would turn into a daily struggle.

To find out more about vaginismus, visit this helpful site: